It never occurred to me that I’d have to think about a Will and Power of Attorney at the age of 38. I thought these things were only dealt with when you were “much older,” with your life partner doing the right thing for your kids (whatever that means!), or if you were filthy rich.
Societal conditioning at its finest.
A Will?! And Power of Attorney? I’m currently physically limited, but I’m still of sound mental health.
Plus, they are scary things to confront.
But after reading Hope for the Best, Plan for the Rest by Dr. Sammy Winemaker and Dr. Hsien Seow, as well as Staring at the Sun by Dr. Irvin Yalom, I was educated.
I put on my big-girl pants and plucked up the courage to face the task of getting these formal documents put in place.
The passages from these books reminded me that it’s not morbid; it can actually be empowering—and it’s a way to honour your own needs and relieve the family from having to second-guess your wishes.
“Planning for what’s to come doesn’t mean giving up hope. It means hoping for the best while preparing your life so others aren’t left in a cloud of confusion, guilt, or conflict.”
Hope for the Best, Plan for the Rest by Dr. Sammy Winemaker & Dr. Hsien Seow
Getting a Discount on Legal Documents
Since AI is so useful to many people these days for a variety of tasks, I used it to help me achieve a discount with my local lawyer from their Will & POA package.
I got £100 off.
In today’s high cost of living climate, this is a huge win, so I recommend you try the same too.
Using ChatGPT, the language it suggested using was to ask for a “compassionate discount for vulnerable persons.” As simple as that.
And this is not something to feel bad about—because you are vulnerable, and you deserve to have all the wins in life at this stage.
What to Think About for Your Will
Even if you don’t think you have a lot to leave behind, your Will is a powerful tool of love and clarity. It is to honour your own needs as much as leaving behind for others.
And if you think it’s solely made for the atypical nuclear family or those with a partner, kids and a reliable family, it’s not. Your Will can be left with friends or someone you trust and any assets left behind can also be treated in the same way.
Here’s what to outline for your Will :
- Beneficiaries: Who do you want to leave money or sentimental possessions to? It could be family, friends, or even a charity.
- Executor: This is the person who will manage your estate and carry out your wishes. Choose someone responsible and ideally, someone you’ve discussed this with.
- Guardianship: If you have minor children or even a pet, you can specify who should care for them.
- Personal Items: Jewellery, photos, keepsakes—these often carry emotional value. Make sure they’re directed to the right people.
- Debts & Expenses: Include instructions about how debts or funeral costs should be paid from your estate.
What to Include in Your Power of Attorney (POA)
A Power of Attorney ensures someone you trust can make decisions on your behalf if you’re not able to—this can be for financial, health, or legal matters.
There are two types commonly used in the UK:
- Continuing Power of Attorney (Property & Financial Affairs)
This allows someone to help manage your money, pay bills, or sell property if needed. - Welfare Power of Attorney (Health & Personal Welfare)
This covers decisions about your care, medical treatment, where you live, and day-to-day personal needs.
Here’s what to consider:
- Choose your Attorney(s) wisely: They should be someone who knows you well, understands your values, and is willing to act on your behalf.
- When it comes into effect: For financial POA, it can be active right away or only if you lose capacity. For welfare POA, it only activates when you’re unable to make decisions yourself.
Discuss your wishes: Talk to your appointed attorney(s) about what matters to you in terms of care, comfort, independence, and quality of life.
Your Funeral Wishes
This is about taking control of the final chapter of your life story—and easing the emotional and logistical burden for your loved ones.
Here’s what to include in your Funeral Wishes document (can be informal, but ideally written down and stored with your Will):
- Burial or Cremation: Do you have a preference?
- Location: Is there a specific cemetery, crematorium, or natural burial ground you prefer?
- Ceremony: Religious, spiritual, or humanist? A celebration of life? Include music, poems, or readings you like.
- People to Notify: Who do you want informed or invited?
- Obituary or Death Notice: Any key points you want shared publicly?
- Donation of Body or Organs: If you’re willing and able, state this clearly.
- Memorial Instructions: Would you like a bench, tree, or just ashes scattered somewhere meaningful?
Putting these documents in place is one of the kindest and most loving things you can do for yourself and for those who care about you.
It’s not about giving up. It’s about showing up for your future with dignity and clarity.
And remember, it’s okay to feel scared. It’s okay to feel unsure. But taking action, even one small step at a time, can turn fear into peace of mind.
Ask for help. Ask for discounts. Talk to your people. Use your voice.
You don’t need to be wealthy, elderly, or perfectly “together” to have your affairs in order—you just need to start.
If you’re ready to take that first step, many law firms offer free 15-minute consultations. Organisations like Solicitors for the Elderly, Citizens Advice, and Age Scotland also have useful guides and low-cost options. If you’re part of a support group, ask if anyone has a recommendation for an empathetic solicitor.
And if all else fails, take my route: AI, bravery, and a healthy dose of curiosity.
Lungevity 